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The Guinness Book of World Records is looking for a new world's oldest cat

Is this you?
Is this you?
ChinaFotoPress/Getty

Guinness is looking for the world's oldest cat. Is it you?

The world's former oldest cat, Tiffany, died at 27 this week in my hometown of San Diego, California. (Note: I am four years older than this cat.) Guinness World Records is now interviewing for her replacement:

"We are currently investigating and verifying the potential successors for the oldest living cat title and will announce this once we’re in a position to do so. We welcome applications for this title on our website, www.guinnessworldrecords.com."

How to break a Guinness record if you're not the world's oldest cat

Tiffany's passing got me thinking: how does Guinness find old cats, or longest nails or biggest anythings, anyway? As its statement to ABC News implies above, you must submit an application using its website. That is, unless you're a brand, company, or a personal brand with money. Phil Edwards reviewed Guinness's new business model in March, which now includes more than just scientific inquiry. You can pay Guinness to find a record for you, and it will help you break it. From the Guinness site:

Our corporate record-breaking solutions incorporate the ultimate accolade of prestige and strength, a Guinness World Records title challenge and are designed to energise employees, bring teams together in a shared sense of achievement and to reaffirm the belief, that anything is achievable.

What does it mean to be a record-breaker if you're not the world's oldest cat? Money.