Unknown hackers took over the Twitter accounts of the New York Post and United Press International on Friday afternoon and used them to post what appears to be fan fiction about World War Three breaking out between the US and China.
The news services took the hacked tweets down quickly, but we've preserved screenshots of the full, exciting narrative.
Apparently, the first sign of war will be a week-long banking holiday:
A second tweet claimed that a "Chinese anti-ship missile" has been fired at the USS George Washington:
Then, a statement from an unnamed "US Joint Chief of staff" that the US navy is in combat with "Chinese vessels":
In this scenario Chinese leader Xi Jinping apparently thinks that the "pivot to Asia" leaves him with no option but immediate war?
The Pope next announces that "World War III has begun." Naturally, Pope Francis would want to break that scoop. The ego on that guy, amirite?
But don't worry, Bank of America savings accounts "will not be affected" by the Federal Reserve decision.
Well, that's a relief! Sure, global thermonuclear war may be imminent, but at least your savings are safe.
This was clearly a hack, as confirmed by UPI World News Reporter J.C. Finley:
@amandataub we'll be making a statement shortly. Suffice to say, we were hacked.— JC Finley (@OneCuriousWorld) January 16, 2015