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I know I've made the right choice. I did what I needed to. But it's really starting to fuck with my head now. It's sinking in. I'm a very affectionate person, and now I have no one to show affection towards. I have no one to come up to and put my arms around, no one to lean against and cuddle with...
September has been my least amount of posts month. Only 49.. so far.. Well this one will be 50. But still compared to all my past months. thats nothing. Can't wait till I get that damn computer next week.
More like starving, really. Maybe a big cup of wholesome tomato soup, garlic bread and banana bread isn't enough for this body for lunch. Need to go to my rental and pick up my mail. (um hello, my subscription to Penthouse isn't being forwarded... wtf?! hahaha!) My tenants are pretty cool people and...
In May, I graduated from college. But I didn't leave. I worked at the Brown library, the Rock, where I had held a student job since the summer after my freshman year. So I continued to walk to work every day from my apartment, a week after graduation, although all my friends had gone home, and I...
I just heard a sad news this evening about the passing away of the father of a Filipino actor who just had a comeback in the Philippines because of his ailing father after living in the US for so many years....and now his father had passed away....He had the chance to be with his father on the last...
"I laugh more often now, I cry more often now" I have been loving Peter Bjorn & John's "Writer's Block" album... after missing my friend by thirty minutes, I took the train home this evening listening to "Objects of My Affection" at full volume... strided home in the rain to it. It felt good. It was...
I woke up at 4 AM, after waking up many times thru the night with acid gut, and decided to go to the kitchen for something to drink. I noticed Spencer was on the floor where he was when I went to bed - normally he'd be sleeping on the sofa. I turned on the light to see if he was OK and found two...
Filmed aboard an aircraft carrier. This gained popularity around the time the US was preparing to invade Iraq. For many people in the military, it said a lot about how they were feeling being away from their families and loved ones, and reminded them that everyone back home was still thinking of...
I can’t believe how depressed I’ve been lately. The most appropriate word to describe how I feel is “sad”. I really wanted to be able to use a more profound word for how I feel… but those three letters ring truer than any others these days. It’s a sadness I can’t shake. I’ve tried....
Outside again. Darkness covers her like a cool veil. Drops fall from her eyes as she walks, step, drop, step, drop. The salt on her lips reminds her of what she's done. His heart is broken. She told him it was over. She knew what would happen. He would cry. She would cry. They would fight. He would...
sigh.... am feeling so quiet today. Last night too. not loving my own reflection, what I have to say, who I am. etc. same old "was doing great then fell in a mud puddle." I can feel sadness holding onto the corners of my mouth, dragging my smile down. My whole face feels heavy. Where did my boot...
Just a few minutes ago I wrote what may very well be the last message I ever write to a woman who I have nearly indescribable affection for. She's simultaneously the kindest, most caring person I've ever known and the most stunning example of the female form I've ever encountered. Her very existence...
With all of these questions and all of this pain how am I supposed to be okay? How am I supposed to trust anything again? It hurts so deep. Two miscarriages. Two times I've had the joy of carrying a baby and it was taken from me. Two times I've had to have surgery to remove it from my body. Two...
ShareMySpace Favorites Del.icio.us MySpace Facebook Digg Google Reddit Live Technorati Furl More... © AddThis Wednesday, July 09, 2008 stopped Current mood: morose Category: Goals, Plans, Hopes i've essentially stopped eating sleeping talking to family (most) talking with friends (many) doing...
Friday, July 11, 2008 i hurt Current mood: busy Category: Life my body lets me know when i've had too much. the last 2 times i've had my chest broke out i was doing too much at school and had my first panic attack, or i was giving up on a couple of things that were very important to my identity at...
A Journey Well Taken by Elaine Williams As a divorcee, I was under the naive impression that women who were widowed didn’t suffer the way divorced women did. After all, the person responsible for some of my pain was still walking around, often causing me more pain. At least, as a widow, there was...
It's time to present a second song that I wrote for this acoustic project. I had this idea on an evening when I was thinking about a friend's father which was very ill. It's called Father hold my hand, some of it is also reminiscences from the passing of my mother years ago.
Sad Story Ahead: A gorilla at a zoo in the German city of Muenster is refusing to let go of her dead baby's body several days after it died of unknown causes. Allwetter Zoo spokeswoman Ilona Zuehlke says the 3-month-old male baby died on Saturday but its 11-year-old mother continues to carry its...
For the past couple of weeks theres been somebody interefering with my relationship with my girlfriend. He has taken all her attention, he has her heart playing his song, and it doesnt seem like he's going to let her go anytime soon. See before confusion came into our lives things were good, I mean...
I went to see Gallagher tonight with a friend. He was funny, but she told me a story before-hand that left me too stunned to care. She told me that my ex-boyfriend became a drug-runner and involved his two sons. They were arrested and sent to prison. The sons, not the dad. I am crushed. Crushed....
