Thursday, July 31, 2014

27 amazing reasons to dissolve the political bands which have connected the US to England

The Declaration of Independence, ratified by the Continental Congress on July 4, 1776 is best known for its clickbait headline about all men being created equal. But Thomas Jefferson was also an important pioneer in the art of listicles and explainer journalism. He understood that complicated ideas are often easier to read and assimilate when they're broken down into a highly structured format that helps guide you through the thinking.

Thus he produces the following 27 reasons these United Colonies ought to become Free and Independent States:

1) He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.

Headshake

2) He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.

Damn

3) He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.

Senate

4) He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.

Far_away

5) He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.

Manlycreys

6) He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.

Nope

7) He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.

Liberty

8) He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.

Judy

9) He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.

Joe_brown

10) He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.

Sustenance

11) He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.

Military

12) He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.

Gun

13) He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation.

Kingjeong

14) For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us.

Wolverine

15) For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States.

Guilty

16) For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world.

Trade

17) For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent.

Taxes

18) For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury.

Jury

19) For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences.

Sailing

20) For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies.

Canada

21) For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments.

Turtle

22) For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

King

23) He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.

Biscuitwar

24) He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.

Pirate

25) He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.

Boltons

26) He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.

Prisoner

27) He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

Mohican

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